Hesperian Health Guides

When you first learn your child cannot hear well

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HealthWiki > Helping Children Who Are Deaf > Chapter 14: Support for parents and caregivers > When you first learn your child cannot hear well

Learning that a child cannot hear well or is deaf can be very upsetting, even for families who have relatives who are deaf or cannot hear well. This is natural. You may have feelings of:

A man thinking.
I don't know anything about deafness. How could I possibly help my child?

  • worry about what to do
  • fears of what it means to be deaf and fears about the future
A woman thinking.
How will my child get married or earn a living?
  • denial
A woman thinking.
My child will hear well if I just find the right treatment.
  • anger at what has happened
A man thinking.
It's not fair that this happened to my family.
  • loneliness
A man thinking.
No one else knows what this is like. No one can help.
  • guilt about what you might have done to cause the deafness
A woman thinking.
If I had eaten better during my pregnancy, this would never have happened.
  • shame because your child
    is deaf
A woman carrying a baby thinking.
What will our neighbors
  • sadness, helplessness, or no feelings at all (depression)
A man thinking.
I feel so hopeless...
  • accepting it as fate or punishment
A woman thinking.
We can't do anything to change a curse. It is just our fate.