Each person is born with either a girl’s body or a boy’s body. These physical differences determine a person’s sex.
A person’s gender role refers to the way a community defines what it is to be a woman or a man. Each community expects women and men to look, think, feel, and act in certain ways, simply because they are women or men. In most communities, for example, women are expected to prepare food, gather water and fuel, and care for their children and partner. Men, however, are often expected to work outside the home to provide for their families and parents in old age, and to defend their families from harm.
Unlike the physical differences between men and women, gender roles are created by the community. Some activities, like washing and ironing clothing, are considered ‘women’s work’ in many communities. But others vary from place to place—depending on a community’s traditions, laws, and religions. Gender roles can even vary within communities, based on how much education a person has, her social status, or her age. For example, in some communities women of a certain class are expected to do domestic work, while other women have more choice about the work they do.
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In most communities, women and men are expected to dress differently, and to do different work. This is part of their gender role. |
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How gender roles are learned
Gender roles are passed down from adults to children. From the time children are very young, parents and others treat girls and boys differently—sometimes without realizing they do so. Children watch their elders closely, noticing how they behave, how they treat each other, and what their roles are in the community.
As children grow up, they accept these roles because they want to please their parents and other respected adults, and because these people have more authority in the community. These roles also help children know who they are and what is expected of them.
As the world changes, gender roles also change. Many young people want to live differently from their parents or grandparents. It can be difficult to change, but as women and men struggle to redefine their gender roles, they can also improve their sexual health.
When gender roles cause harm
Fulfilling the roles expected by the community can be satisfying and can give a woman a sense of belonging and success. But these roles can also limit a woman’s choices, and sometimes make her feel less valued than a man. When this happens, everyone—the woman herself, her family, and her community—suffers.
In most communities, women are expected to be wives and mothers. Many women like this role because it can be very satisfying and it gives them status in the community. Other women would prefer to follow their own interests but their families and communities do not give them this choice. If she is expected to have many children, a woman may have less chance to learn new skills or go to school. Most of her time and energy will be spent taking care of others’ needs. Or, if a woman is unable to have children, her community may value her less than other women.
Don't bother your father. He works hard and needs rest.
Most communities value men’s work more than women’s work. For example, a woman may work all day—and then cook, clean, and care for her children at night. But because her husband’s work is considered more important, she is careful about his rest—not her own. Her children will grow up thinking men’s work is more important, and value women less.
Women are often considered more emotional than men, and they are freer to express these emotions with others. Men, however, are often taught that showing emotions like fear, sadness, or tenderness is ‘unmanly’, so they hide these feelings. Or they express their feelings in angry or violent ways that are more acceptable for men. When men are unable to show their feelings, children may feel more distant from their fathers, and men are less able to get support from others for their problems.
Women are often discouraged from speaking—or forbidden to attend or speak—at community meetings. This means the community only hears about what men think—for example, how they view a problem and their solutions for it. Since women have much knowledge and experience, the whole community suffers when they cannot discuss problems and offer suggestions for change.
Women and men who have sexual relations with people of the same sex (homosexuals) are sometimes made to feel like outcasts in their own communities. Even if they are respected in other ways, they may be forced to live and love in secrecy and shame. In some communities, fear or lack of understanding of people in same sex relationships has even led to physical violence against them. Any time a person is made to feel afraid or ashamed about who he or she is, it harms the person’s mental and sexual health.
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This page was updated:01 Feb 2021