Knowing when the stress is too much

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HealthWiki > Promoting Community Mental Health > Chapter 9: Helping ourselves to do this work > Knowing when the stress is too much

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In this chapter:

 

In this chapter:

• Chapter 9: Helping ourselves to do this work
• Noticing how we react to others and what to do about it
• Knowing when the stress is too much
• Stronger now, stronger in the long run

Burnout is a stress overload. It can happen to anyone, whether a parent, caregiver, student, or worker. In many work settings, burnout happens when we are asked to help people with problems caused by conditions—poverty, racism, violence against women, and other structural inequalities—that can only be solved by social change. Even though we may repeatedly improve things for one individual or group at a time, the supply of problems seems never-ending. As if that wasn’t hard enough, our organizations and agencies almost always lack the resources we need to do our work well. When our tasks move from being “a challenge” to feeling overwhelming, that’s burnout. Although burnout is caused by injustice in the workplace and society in general, it is often experienced as personal failure.

Burnout creates mental and physical exhaustion. For some people, burnout shows in the body with problems such as difficulty sleeping, headaches or other body aches, intestinal problems, or lack of energy. It can create emotional problems like irritability, anger, numbness, an inability to be emotionally involved, and depression. People often feel they must face these difficulties alone and blame themselves for not being good or strong enough, but the real problem is the conditions causing the burnout, not you.

Avoiding burnout means knowing the work we do is hard. We witness people going through overwhelming experiences. To be able to help, we need to be prepared and well-rested. We need to “walk the talk” when it comes to caring for our own wellness and follow the same advice we would give others.

At my office, we have a code word for when our workload, personal life, or their combination becomes too much. “I’m in the ditch” means feeling like you’re a truck stuck in the mud. Digging out by yourself is too hard, so let someone throw you a tow rope! When one of us says: “Ditch!” others pitch in right away with help, give you space, or at least make sure you eat lunch! Our supervisors do this too, modeling that it’s OK to admit things are “too much” and that looking out for each other is part of our jobs.

Helping the helpers. When helping people get through health or other problems caused or made worse by inequality and injustice, how is it possible to sustain commitment over a long time? The Migrant Clinicians Network (MCN) supports a vast network of health professionals who advocate for and provide services to migrants and others in difficult situations. Within MCN, the Witness to Witness (W2W) Program offers concrete support to health care workers whose care for stressed-out people is itself stressful. The program recognizes the high emotional cost from feeling empathy and compassion day after day, alongside the distress from constantly witnessing the huge harms from systemic and structural causes that don’t go away, leading to an endless flow of people who need help.

Witness to Witness sets up peer support groups, offers one-on-one sessions that provide a “listening ear” for clinicians, and helps organizations look at the workplace to see what could make it less stressful.

In our work, we talk about “moral injury” to describe what health workers and others go through when their jobs force them to go against their own beliefs. For example, when they can’t help a child who needs an expensive medicine and it isn’t available to them. The way a lot of people talk about burnout tends to focus on each individual’s response to work conditions, whereas “moral injury” directs attention to the conditions themselves.

Though people must depend on their inner resources to get through a bad moment, never forget that “on-the-job stress” is caused by…the job! Solutions come from fixing the workplace and getting the resources that would allow us do our jobs with less stress.

Follow our own advice

“Take care of yourself so you can take care of others.” It’s so easy to say, but so hard to do! For many of us, it can feel like one more task we don’t have time for, one more demand we can’t meet.

Just as we look to already-existing strengths, knowledge, and connections to promote community mental health, we can draw on these same resources to address our own stress.

How to identify and look for solutions to stress overload

When you know you are not the only one at work or among your friends feeling overwhelmed, you can support each other by talking about what causes your stresses and how to better cope with them, both individually and as a group (see the activity below). Besides describing what causes stress, also focus on what helps relieve it.

• Things you do that help you feel better: walking, playing or watching sports, cooking, reading or writing, engaging with music and art, spiritual practices, gardening, caring for pets. Can you do more of these or do them with others? (See Dealing with all the stress.)
• Supportive family, friendships, networks, and community connections: look to your religious or spiritual community, take classes to learn new skills, join groups for recreation, outings, or activism.
• Are there ways you handle stress that you’d like to stop or change? Maybe you and a friend can check in on how each of you is doing with making some changes.

More of this:

take walks

leave work on time

read novels

visit my sister

play with kids

Less of this:

social media scrolling

too much coffee

zoning out with TV

smoking

bringing work home

Activity

Find stress-busters

Identifying and discussing what we have available to us—our personal strengths, social connections, and other resources—can help to lower the stress in a workplace and for the individuals in it.

1. Discuss these or similar questions as a group:

• What are your common causes of stress at work?
• What are the causes of stress for the people you help through your work?
• How does your stress affect how you work with both your co-workers and the people you help?
• What do you do to support others in reducing stress?
• What do you do to help yourself avoid burnout?

Stresses

work too much

long commute

Supports

church choir, book group, family walks

Strengths:

humor, tenacious, kind

Stress-busters:

baking, dancing, garden, swimming

2. Have each person fold a piece of paper in 4. Label and list for each section:

• your stresses
• your strengths
• your supports
• your stress-busters

3. Ask each person to share a few of their examples with the group, then discuss:

• What do you do in common? What do you do differently? What new ideas will you add to your own list?
• How can you support each other individually and as a group to reduce stress?

Make time to check in every week or two about what practices lessen the stress, make it worse, or show the need for bigger changes in the workplace.

I get fed up with being told to buy scented candles and take a bath. Self-care for me is spending time with friends to do something meaningful and creative, something that reminds me of the strength of working together and being part of a community.

Most Sundays, I get together with my family, 3 generations of us! My aunt is a great cook and we all help. Lots of laughter and stories. Starting Monday happier and more relaxed makes the whole week better.

What are you doing outside of work that helps you switch gears and get recharged?

I’ve joined my neighborhood “rollers and strollers” environmental advocacy group. Being with people who care about, improve, and use our walking and bike paths reminds me of the bigger picture when work gets frustrating.

I reset every day by writing down specific people and things I’m grateful for, along with other quick thoughts on my mind.

This page was updated:18 Apr 2025