How Gender Roles Affect Sexual Health

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HealthWiki > Where Women Have No Doctor > Chapter 12: Sexual Health > How Gender Roles Affect Sexual Health

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In this chapter:

 

In this chapter:

Harmful beliefs about women's sexuality

What it means to be a woman or a man in a particular community includes beliefs about sexuality—that is, about sexual behavior, and how people feel about their own bodies.

A few harmful beliefs about women’s sexuality that are common in many communities are described below. These beliefs and other harmful effects of gender roles can prevent women from having control over their sexual lives. This makes them more likely to have sexual health problems.

Harmful belief: Women’s bodies are shameful

Our bodies are not causes for shame. Our bodies allow us to touch and care for others, and to feel sexual pleasure. Our bodies are something to discover, love, and value.

Parents begin to teach their children about their bodies as soon as they are born. They may not do this directly, but by how they hold or touch the child or by their tone of voice.

As a little girl grows, she becomes curious about her body. She wants to know what the different parts are called and why children have different genitals. But she is often scolded for being curious, and is told that “nice girls” do not ask such things. If she touches her genitals, she is taught that it is dirty or shameful and that she should keep those parts hidden.

These reactions teach a little girl that her body is something to be ashamed of. This will make it hard for her to ask questions about changes in her body as she enters puberty, about her menstrual period, or about sex. She may be too embarrassed to talk to a health worker, because she does not know what parts of her body are called or what questions to ask. When she starts having sex, she is less likely to understand how her body feels sexual pleasure or how to protect herself from unwanted pregnancy or STIs.

Harmful belief: A woman cannot be happy without a man

Some women do not want to marry or have sexual relationships with men. They may have romantic and sexual relationships with other women, with people of another gender (like nonbinary people), or no romantic or sexual relationships. Although they often face discrimination, these women can live full and happy lives.

The idea that a woman can only be happy with a man is often used as an excuse to control women’s lives, and it has even been used to justify sexual violence. It implies that a woman herself is not a whole person, and is only important as a companion for a man. This belief is frustrating for many women.

Harmful belief: Women’s bodies belong to men

Some girls are married as children to make sure they will be virgins. This can cause serious health problems for a girl and her babies).

In many communities, a woman is treated like the property of her father or husband. As a child, she belongs to her father, and he can arrange to have her marry or do whatever work he chooses. Her future husband wants his property to be “pure” and unspoiled by other men, so he expects her to be a virgin. After marriage, he feels he has the right to use her body for his pleasure whenever he wants. He may have sex with other women, but she is to be his alone.

These beliefs cause great harm. They teach a girl that other people make the important decisions about her life—it does not matter what she wants or what skills she could contribute to her community. Because virginity is valued so highly, she may marry at a young age. When she starts having sex, it may not be with her consent, and she may not be able to use family planning methods or protect herself from STIs.

Men do not own women’s bodies! A woman’s body is hers, and she should be able to decide how, when, and with whom to share it.

Harmful belief: Women have less sexual desire

A woman is often taught that it is part of her duty as a wife to meet her husband’s sexual demands. But if she is a “good” woman, she will not want sex. If she discusses sex, her partner may think she is sexually experienced and therefore “bad.”

How far should I go? I like him, but I’m afraid of what he’ll think.

If a woman believes she should not think about sex, she will be unprepared to have sex in a safe and enjoyable way. She is less likely to learn about family planning and how to get and use condoms. Even if she has this information, it will be harder for her to discuss these things with her partner beforehand.

Once she is in a sexual relationship, she is likely to let her partner control the kind of relationship they have. This includes when and how they have sex, whether they use family planning or practice safer sex (see page 189), and whether he has sex with other women. This puts her at risk for unwanted pregnancy and STIs.

But sexual desire is a part of most people’s lives, and women can feel as much sexual desire and pleasure as men.

This page was updated:13 Nov 2023